counting my way back to you
by l0ngl0st
Summary: "Did you know that panda lilies will release almost 120 pounds of pollen when they bloom? I bet the fire lilies are gorgeous where you are." Numbers are easy, straightforward; they say exactly what they mean. Jinora doesn't know how to put missing someone on a scale. / Kai&Jinora, exploring the world while they're worlds apart. Pre-Book 4, one-shot.


**A/N: **Two words: TIME SKIP. Takes place before the start of book 4, during the interim. Also, you guys should check out words-with-dragons' piece "Letters" for more long-distance Kainora cuteness asdfghjkl; and hers is gonna be a three-shot, so! :D

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_A million more miles 'til I get to see you,  
A thousand more minutes I know I'll have to go through  
Counting my (counting my) way back to you,  
Back to you  
_~"Counting," Christina Grimmie

* * *

_v._

_Did you know that panda lilies will release up to 120 pounds of pollen during their blooming season? I bet the fire lilies are gorgeous where you are._

Jinora twirls the stem between her fingers and closes her eyes, breathing in the mountain air. Through her window, she can see Mount Makapu standing silent in the distance. It took her the better part of two weeks to convince her father to let them visit its mouth. Up high, the verdant green patches gave way to gray, craggy rock, but the black-and-white panda lilies, petals curling, were worth it. She and Ikki gathered enough for a bouquet for their mother and their host family, and enough for Jinora to keep one, pressed between the pages of one of her books.

It's the historical romance; the lily marks the spot where the heroine leaps into the volcano. A fitting connection, Jinora thinks, but she hasn't had much time for love stories, lately. The world is huge and better seen from outside the confines of Air Temple Island's library, but Jinora still wishes she could do it with her best friend by her side.

Unfortunately—or fortunately, depending on one's sense of adventure—Kai is in Fire Fountain City. His last letter was filled with details of the local fair: _the carnival was awesome! I rocked the ring toss. They wouldn't let me try the strength test though. Opal says it's 'cause I'm too scrawny._

Jinora shakes her head, imagining Kai sulking. His growth spurt did wonders for his pride; she distinctly remembers him puffing out his chest at the one inch he had over her last year, before they parted ways again.

"Jinora! It's time to eat!" bellows Meelo.

Quickly, Jinora grabs her pen and scribbles, _I agree with Opal; you are_, before answering her family's call.

_iv._

_Question: how many purple berries does it take to get a stomachache?  
Answer: Based on careful observation and experimentation, 225. 140 if you're Meelo._

Jang Hui's waters sparkle a clear blue; Jinora has a hard time believing they were ever otherwise. The statue of the Painted Lady at the center of town makes her smile; she knows the story well.

On afternoons, Tenzin takes her, Ikki, and Meelo to the west end of the village, where the wooden platforms are a bit more rickety and the straw-thatched roofs are beginning to sag. The three of them provide much-needed relief to the working villagers, bringing water and pulling a breeze to cool off the sweating laborers. Jinora is always amazed by the strength of the gap-toothed old fishermen, whose hands hammer and lash boards together without complaining. Sometimes the villagers invite her onto the roofs with them and let her hold down the straw while they attach the bundles. Jinora has also become the designated storyteller, layering her voice over the sound of rustling leaves.

"You see this, Jiao?" one woman calls to her little boy, pointing a crooked finger at Jinora. "That girl's an airbending master, but does she consider herself above this kind of work? No. So why don't you lend your poor old mother a hand, hm?"

The boy looks nonplussed, squinting at Jinora's shiny tattoo in the sunlight. Jinora estimates him to be about eight and smiles at him reassuringly.

From the end of the dock, a ruckus emerges. Meelo barrels by on an air scooter, nearly knocking a basket off the boardwalk and into the water, and Jinora frowns at him and peers over the edge of the roof, calling, "Be _careful_, Meelo!"

In response, Meelo sticks out his tongue, dyed purple from the berries he's been consuming throughout the day. "You're not the boss of me, Jinora!"

"Listen to your sister," Tenzin says from farther off, and Jinora shoots Meelo a victorious grin while he pouts.

Five minutes later: _"_Daaaad, my stomach hurts. Can I go home?"

"_What_ did I tell you about eating too many purple berries, Meelo?"

Jinora makes a mental note to ask Kai about the food on Kyoshi Island.

_iii._

_It's 8 days by sky bison and 4 days by airship from here to Omashu. I'm so jealous that you get to be there. Trade places with me?_

In reality, Jinora is happy to be in Shu Jing. The waterfalls fill her ears night and day, rushing in the background, and the wildlife grows uninhibited. More than once, she's walked out to the backyard patio in the cool fog of morning and seen a badgerfrog resting in the grass, staring unblinkingly at her, or an eagle hawk perched on the nearby tree. Combined with the spirits drifting through, the whole place has an ethereal air.

If Kai were here, they'd be wandering through the hills tracking down the various fauna. As it is, Jinora tries—and fails—to sketch the animals she sees throughout the day; Kai writes back detailing the _"super crazy cart ride"_ through the city, and suddenly, Jinora wonders.

Wonders what she has to offer Kai, when he's gotten to go to all the bustling cities and she and her family have been relegated to small, out of the way towns. What exciting tidbits does she have? What if they reunite and every other word out of her mouth is just—_boring?_

What if that's already how it is?

So she sticks to numbers. _Fun facts_ and _did you knows_ and any other interesting information she can dig up, and not once does she mention _hey, the sunset was gorgeous the other day and I thought about how nice it would be if you'd been here with me to eat moon peaches and sit on the roof,_ because it's all terribly mundane compared to the adventures Kai must be having.

Numbers are simple. Straightforward. They say exactly what they mean.

She doesn't know how to put missing someone on a scale.

_ii._

At Jinora's birthday dinner, the table is full. Rohan gets his own seat now, though he usually ends up crawling into Pema's lap by the end of the meal. But despite Ikki's elbow jabbing into her from the right, despite Tenzin pressing a kiss to her forehead and murmuring, "Happy birthday, dear," despite Aunt Kya and Uncle Bumi taking up the other side of the table, Jinora still feels something missing.

Kai's absence is less of a physical pain and more of an ache, a strange, boy-shaped space that follows her like a shadow. It sounds stupid to admit, but this morning when she woke up—despite the fact that they've been apart for about five months now—she was momentarily confused when the only green eyes that greeted her at the breakfast table belonged to her mother and her youngest brother.

In the next room over, the phone rings. Kya rises to get it, then—"Jinora, it's for you!"

Jinora takes the receiver shakily, uncertain.

"_Jinora,"_ the voice at the other end smiles, wrapping around her like a favorite blanket, and Jinora relaxes, slightly. "Happy birthday."

"K-Kai," she stammers, and all the thoughts she's been collecting fly out the window, a kite cut from its strings. What does she say?

_Fact: I'm fourteen now._

_Fact: I miss you._

"This is a lot more convenient than letters, huh?" asks Kai, oblivious to her hesitation. "_Oh,_ that reminds me—guess what?"

"What?"

As Kai launches into his story, the tension in Jinora's shoulders dissipates. She cradles the phone closer, as if it'll lessen the distance between them, and when it comes time for her to speak, she finds she has no shortage of words.

And Kai listens eagerly to every one.

_i._

It's funny, how coming home feels strange and familiar all at once. They settle back into Air Temple Island seamlessly, but sometimes Jinora misses the sound of waves lapping against the pier or waterfalls raging or the silent, stoic presence of a mountain in the distance.

But even while she loses those things, she gets something back. Kai's feet touch the ground before Jinora can finish her countdown, and she practically flies into his arms, distance disappearing in a flash.

"Whoa!" he laughs, knocked back a little by the force of her embrace before he rights the two of them. He's grown; she has to rise on her tiptoes slightly in order to bury her face in his neck. "Miss me?" Kai manages through the tight hold Jinora has around his chest, his voice coming out slightly breathless.

"You know the answer to that," Jinora mumbles, not bothering to pull back so she can punch his shoulder. She'll get to that later.

Kai's hands run down her back, settling around her waist; she can feel his cheeks pull into a smile as he squeezes back.

Without meaning to, she starts counting. _1, 2, 3, 4, 5…_

Kai doesn't let go for a long, long time.


End file.
